Metric Thunder News

To Shield or Not to Shield...

One day in the blistering heat of the summer, when I was riding shieldless on my old Shadow cruiser while wearing the appropriate bike-riding sh!t eating grin... an impressive size insect of an unknown exotic species, passed my teeth... over my tongue... & smacked me right in the back of the throat. I gagged.... coughed... spit... sputtered... hacked & retched... all with no success... all the while, trying to watch the traffic & keep the bike under control... & as always important, trying to keep up the cool biker look...

Looking suspiciously like some drug-crazed biker obviously going through some sort of chemical-induced hallucinogenic convulsions to any of the frightened inhabitants of the nearby cages, as I flailed about, jerking my head side to side, up & down... making contorting faces that make old women & children run screaming for their very lives... trying my darndest to expel that unidentifiable rough textured gob of goo with legs too near to my taste buds. As the fearful & nervous law abiding citizens guided their square boxy cages in an increasingly widening pattern to give this crazed biker all the room he might need, I made it to the side of that highway & thank God was able to at least have the foresight to remember to put the kick-stand down as I hopped off that bike like I was on fire! I bent over with my head between my legs as a wave of nausea poured over me & beads of sweat covered my forehead.... nothing... that sucker was too far back & NOT coming up or out! I knew just what I had to do.... I gritted my teeth... closed my eyes... & SWALLOWED... as I felt somewhat better after it was all over, I had the nastiest bug taste in my mouth for hours... NOT a taste I ever want to have again.

These days on my steel horse... I ride with a shield.

Blog from wvKawBoy

If you have any thoughts or opinions on this subject, send 'em to me at bob@metricthunder.com and I'll post 'em.

MTB

January 28, 2006 10:56 PM