To Shield or Not to Shield
One day in the blistering heat of the summer, when I was riding shieldless on my old Shadow cruiser while wearing the appropriate bike-riding sh!t eating grin… an impressive size insect of an unknown exotic species, passed my teeth… over my tongue… & smacked me right in the back of the throat. I gagged…. coughed… spit… sputtered… hacked & retched… all with no success… all the while, trying to watch the traffic & keep the bike under control… & as always important, trying to keep up the cool biker look…Looking suspiciously like some drug-crazed biker obviously going through some sort of chemical-induced hallucinogenic convulsions to any of the frightened inhabitants of the nearby cages, as I flailed about, jerking my head side to side, up & down… making contorting faces that make old women & children run screaming for their very lives… trying my darndest to expel that unidentifiable rough textured gob of goo with legs too near to my taste buds. As the fearful & nervous law abiding citizens guided their square boxy cages in an increasingly widening pattern to give this crazed biker all the room he might need, I made it to the side of that highway & thank God was able to at least have the foresight to remember to put the kick-stand down as I hopped off that bike like I was on fire! I bent over with my head between my legs as a wave of nausea poured over me & beads of sweat covered my forehead…. nothing… that sucker was too far back & NOT coming up or out! I knew just what I had to do…. I gritted my teeth… closed my eyes… & SWALLOWED… as I felt somewhat better after it was all over, I had the nastiest bug taste in my mouth for hours… NOT a taste I ever want to have again.
These days on my steel horse… I ride with a shield.
Blog from wvKawBoy
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MTB
